For many people, the holidays are a time to reconnect with family, create traditions, and enjoy festive celebrations. But if you or a loved one has experienced psychological trauma—whether through loss, divorce, or family conflict—this season can feel especially overwhelming and painful.
The lasting effects of these difficult experiences don’t pause for holiday cheer. Understanding this reality is the first step toward protecting well-being during what should be a restorative time.
5 Reasons Trauma Can Feel Harder During the Holidays
The holidays tend to amplify emotions and memories, making them particularly tough for those carrying the weight of past experiences. In fact, a survey by the American Psychiatric Association found that nearly one-quarter of Americans feel more stressed during the holiday season than at any other time of year.
Everyday stressors include financial concerns, family conflicts, and the pressure to meet social expectations. These stressors can exacerbate existing mental health conditions and increase vulnerability to trauma triggers.
Another survey, this one by the American Psychological Association, also highlights how holiday season can amplify feelings of loneliness, anxiety, and depression, especially for those with a history of trauma or loss. About 40 percent of respondents reported that their stress increases at this time of year.
Here are five reasons why trauma can resurface and feel more intense during this time of year.
1. Nervous System Overload
Our brains don’t distinguish between past and present when processing traumatic memories—they feel immediate and real, regardless of when they occurred. This neurological reality explains why holiday triggers can feel so overwhelming and why traditional “just think positive” advice falls short. The combination of increased social demands and sensory overload can overwhelm the nervous system, making it harder to manage emotions effectively.
2. The Gap Between Reality and Expectations
There’s often a significant gap between the joyful expectations society sets and what you or your loved one might actually be feeling inside—grief, sadness, or anxiety that seems to intensify as December approaches. Seeing others’ seemingly perfect celebrations can make you feel isolated or like you’re missing out on something fundamental about the human experience.
3. Reminders of Loss
Sometimes, the holidays coincide with anniversaries of difficult events, making those feelings even more intense. Family gatherings and traditions can highlight the absence of loved ones who are no longer with us due to death, divorce, or estrangement. Feelings of sadness, loneliness, and grief can resurface alongside traumatic memories.
4. Disrupted Routines
During the holidays, our normal routines typically get overturned, which can be especially tough for children and teens who thrive with predictability. School vacations, late nights, and the absence of structure can impact them both emotionally and physically.
5. Social and Financial Stressors
Social pressures add another layer of difficulty that many trauma survivors find particularly challenging. You might feel expected to put on a happy face or to reconcile with family members you’re not ready to face. And let’s not forget the financial stress that often comes with gift-giving and holiday expenses, which can weigh heavily on adults of all ages, especially when they’re struggling emotionally.
Download the guide to take a holiday anxiety quiz and get your personalized stress reliever.
We’ve got tips and strategies to support you with seasonal stressors like:
- Dealing with family complications
- Coping with gift-giving anxiety
- Overcoming your inner Scrooge
- Finding the awe without the stress
- and more!
Common Trauma Triggers During the Holiday Season
Understanding trauma triggers during the holidays helps you prepare rather than simply react when they arise. These environmental and social cues can unexpectedly transport us back to painful moments, creating what feels like an emotional ambush during what’s supposed to be a celebratory time. When you know what might affect you or a loved one, you can create strategies to manage that response.
Places: Certain places—like your childhood home or family gathering spots—might hold painful associations that your nervous system remembers even when your conscious mind tries to focus on the present moment.
People: Some family members may be tied to difficult experiences, making interactions feel like navigating a minefield of potential emotional explosions.
Surroundings: Even seemingly innocent holiday traditions, foods, or decorations can serve as powerful reminders of past experiences, triggering responses that feel disproportionate to the current situation.
Sensory experiences: Holiday music playing in stores, the scent of certain foods cooking, or even the texture of wrapping paper can catch us off guard and activate memories. These sensory triggers work through pathways in the brain that process information faster than our conscious awareness, which is why they can feel so sudden and intense.
Social situations: Old family dynamics may resurface with surprising intensity, and well-meaning but intrusive questions about your personal life can feel invasive when you’re already emotionally vulnerable.
Alcohol intake: The increased presence of alcohol at parties can heighten anxiety or bring up past experiences related to substance use, creating additional layers of stress.
Signs of Trauma to Watch for During the Holidays
The body and mind have sophisticated trauma responses, and learning how to read these signals in yourself or a loved one helps you respond with compassion and take positive action.
Physical signs include:
- Trouble sleeping that seems to worsen as holiday events approach
- Persistent headaches that don’t respond to usual remedies
- Muscle tension that feels like carrying invisible weight
- Panic attacks that seem to come from nowhere
- Feeling unusually tired before, during, or after holiday events
Emotional red flags include:
- Mood swings that seem more intense than usual
- Periods of numbness where you feel disconnected from yourself and others
- Mounting anxiety about upcoming events that seems out of proportion to the actual plans
- Intrusive memories that pop up without warning
- Intense feelings of sadness and loneliness
Behavioral signs of trauma include:
- Avoiding social gatherings
- Increased substance use
- Withdrawing from loved ones
- Neglecting self-care routines
- Irritability and lashing out at loved ones
Supporting Children and Teens with Trauma During the Holiday Season
- Create a Safe and Supportive Environment: Encourage open communication, and let your child know they can share their thoughts without judgment. Spend quality time together, engaging in activities they enjoy, and be present to listen to their concerns.
- Be Mindful of Triggers: As we’ve discussed, holidays can bring up reminders of past trauma, so be aware of potential triggers. Check in with your child about what they might find difficult, and offer alternatives to traditional activities if needed. Allow them to opt out of situations that might be overwhelming for them.
- Encourage Healthy Coping Strategies: Help your child or teen develop healthy coping mechanisms, such as mindfulness, journaling, or engaging in creative activities (see our chart of self-care strategies below). Encourage them to take breaks when needed and to express their emotions through art, music, or physical activity.
- Maintain Routines: While the holiday season can disrupt regular schedules, try to keep some routines that provide structure and predictability. Consistent mealtimes, sleep schedules, and activities can help create a sense of normalcy and security during a potentially chaotic time.
- Involve Them in Decision-Making: Empower your child by involving them in decisions about holiday plans and activities. This can help them feel more in control and respected. Ask for their input on how to celebrate or what traditions to keep or modify, and do your best to respect their preferences and boundaries.
Coping Strategies for Holiday-Related Trauma in Young Adults
- Plan Ahead: Set clear boundaries about what you’re comfortable with during the holiday season. Decide in advance how long you’ll stay at gatherings, which events you’ll attend, and conversation topics you want to avoid. Communicate these limits to family and friends to reduce stress.
- Schedule Breaks: Intentionally plan for breaks between events to recharge and process your emotions. Taking breaks is essential for your mental well-being, especially when navigating potential triggers or challenging dynamics.
- Build a Support Network: Reach out to friends, support group members, or mental health professionals who understand your experiences. Establish these connections before the holidays to create a safety net for when you need support.
- Have an Exit Strategy: Prepare a concrete exit plan for overwhelming situations. Knowing how you can leave—whether through having your own transportation, a code word with a friend, or simply allowing yourself to leave without explanation—can provide a sense of security.
- Practice Self-Care: Prioritize self-care during the holiday season. Engage in activities that help you relax and recharge, whether that’s spending time in nature, practicing mindfulness, or enjoying a favorite hobby. Taking care of yourself is crucial for managing stress and maintaining mental health. Download our guide to get tips for overcoming holiday anxiety.
Holiday Trauma Coping Techniques: Types, Descriptions, and When to Use Them
Effective coping strategies for holiday-related trauma go beyond simple stress management—they involve creating a comprehensive support system that honors both your healing journey and your current needs. The goal isn’t to eliminate all discomfort, but rather to develop tools that help you navigate difficult moments with greater resilience and self-compassion.
| Coping Technique | Type | Description | When to Use It |
| Deep Breathing | Grounding | Take slow, controlled breaths to calm the nervous system | When feeling anxious or overwhelmed |
| 5-4-3-2-1 Sensory Exercise | Grounding | Identify 5 things you see, 4 you feel, 3 you hear, 2 you smell, 1 you taste | To stay present during triggering moments |
| Mindfulness Meditation | Mindfulness | Practice keeping focused attention on the present moment without judgment | To reduce stress and increase emotional regulation |
| Progressive Muscle Relaxation | Mindfulness | Tense and relax each muscle group, one by one, to release tension | When experiencing physical tension or anxiety |
| Setting Boundaries | Self-Care | Communicate limits on what you can handle or participate in | Before or during social/family events |
| Scheduling Breaks | Self-Care | Plan downtime to rest and recharge between holiday activities | Between holiday activities or gatherings |
| Engaging Supportive People | Social Support | Connect with trusted friends or family for comfort | When feeling isolated or triggered |
| Creating New Traditions | Self-Care | Develop meaningful activities that feel safe and nurturing | To replace or supplement difficult traditions |
| Journaling | Emotional Processing | Write down your thoughts and feelings to process emotions | To reflect on experiences or release emotions |
| Professional Therapy | Therapeutic Support | Work with a therapist trained in treating trauma and PTSD | When symptoms persist or worsen |
When to Seek Professional Help
Sometimes, the holiday season can activate trauma responses in ways that are difficult to manage alone, and recognizing when to seek professional support for yourself or your child is a sign of wisdom rather than weakness. Mental health professionals understand the challenges this season presents and can provide specialized tools and perspectives that make a meaningful difference.
If you or a loved one is experiencing symptoms that persist beyond the holidays or begin interfering with daily functioning (like work, relationships, sleep, or basic self-care), it’s important to consider professional support. Warning signs that warrant immediate attention include:
- Increasing reliance on substances to cope
- Thoughts of self-harm or suicide
- Inability to function in daily responsibilities, like school, work, or parenting
Types of Support for Trauma
Professional help can take many forms, depending on your specific needs and circumstances. Trauma-focused therapy approaches like EMDR or cognitive processing therapy can help address the root causes of holiday triggers rather than just managing symptoms. Psychiatric evaluation might be helpful if you’re considering medication to support your mental health.
Support groups, whether in-person or online, can provide a connection with others who understand the challenges of navigating holidays after trauma. Crisis resources, including hotlines and emergency services, offer immediate support when you need it most. These services exist because healing from difficult experiences often requires professional guidance and community support.
Over time, with patience and appropriate support, the holidays can turn from a season of survival into an opportunity to create new, meaningful experiences that honor both the past and the present. This transformation doesn’t erase the past, but it does create space for hope, connection, and the possibility of joy alongside the ongoing work of healing.
Newport Healthcare’s Approach to Trauma Treatment
At Newport Healthcare, trauma-informed care forms the foundation of every treatment approach, recognizing that healing happens within the context of safety, trustworthiness, and collaboration. Rather than simply addressing symptoms, our comprehensive programs focus on understanding and treating the underlying impact of traumatic experiences on the whole person—mind, body, and spirit.
Our approach emphasizes addressing root causes using evidence-based methods tailored to each individual’s history, strengths, and goals. This personalized care recognizes that no two people experience or heal from trauma in the same way, and effective treatment must honor these differences while providing proven therapeutic interventions.
We offer comprehensive programs to support children, teens, and young adults as they navigate the challenges that arise during the holidays and beyond. Whether you’re struggling with overwhelming memories, sensory triggers, or complex family dynamics, we provide personalized care to help you regain a sense of safety and peace. Take the first step toward healing today.
Sources
American Psychiatric Association, 2024
American Psychological Association, 2023
Front Neurosci. 2022 Nov; 16 :1015749.
SAMHSA: Trauma-Informed Care in Behavioral Health Services